Friday, August 29, 2008


One night I had a dream--I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord and across the sky flashed scenes from my life. For each scene I noticed two sets of footprints, one belonged to me and the other to the Lord. When the last scene of my life flashed before me,I looked back at the footprints in the sand.I noticed that many times along the path of my life,there was only one set of footprints.I also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in my life. This really bothered me and I questioned the Lord about it. "Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you,you would walk with me all the way,but I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life there is only one set of footprints. "I don't understand why in times when I needed you most,you should leave me." The Lord replied, "My precious, precious child,I love you and I would never, never leave you during your times of trial and suffering. "When you saw only one set of footprints,it was then that I carried you."...Mary Stevenson

Results: Breast Cancer 111
I had a lot of tests yesterday. It was a long and tiring day. Too much info passing over my head. I was looking through a fog and not sure where I was going? I saw the breast doctor and the oncologist. Both concerned and wanted to aggressively care for me as the cancer is aggressive. Scared and waiting for more tests hoping that it has not traveled anywhere else? God please I am begging for answers.

Next week the beginning of the journey: Chemo begins then later surgery and then radiation.

Scared....Telling my girls, losing my hair and just staying away for the outside germs for awhile. I am very heavy with preparing myself to hand over my responsibilities to my family. I am aching inside.

I will try to update as much as I can. Email or call anytime. Encourage the girls. Pray, pray, pray.

I want to fight for my life. I am going to FIGHT FOR MY LIFE!



ThreeGirlyGirls said...

Your story is just beginning. Hold onto His promises. He has big things to show you in the coming weeks. Look for the signs that He is with you! You will see them!!

You know I've covered you in my prayers and I will continue to and keep you on every prayer list I can think of. I love you, you stay strong, you are strong woman and I KNOW you will beat this and fight it like crazy!!! ****HUGS BIG TIME!!!

Room for Grace said...

Just came over here from three girly girls. I am so sorry you are having to deal with such a harsh realitly. I am 38 as well, and I can feel your ache, esp. as a mom. Last year my mom and dad were both dx w/ cancer. Both 67 yrs old. Dad-lung cancer, mom- breast cancer, and it runs in our family. I also had a mass around my bladder that was MRIed, but it turned out ok. I have a friend, 38 as well who is just finishing up her breast cancer treatments.
It is hard, that is for sure. One day at a time, reading your bible, falling into the arms of the Lord are the ONLY way. Enlist lots of help, and ASK for what you need. I will pray for peace and protection for your family, and total healing for you.
God bless you on this journey. My dad recently said that he would have never believed before all of this what blessings are found on this difficult road called cancer. Both my parents are presently cancer free. If someone would have told me a year ago my dad would still be alive, I would have never believed them. Your days are in the hands of the Lord. He loves your children too. He will never leave you or forsake you. Hold on tight!

On Purpose said...

I love you Cindy and I know God is holding on to you!

Leebird said...

I am not going to even pretend that I understand what you are going through. I have never had breast cancer, and no one in my life has either. But, I will say that my heart breaks for you--a sister-in-Christ I have never met. I am visiting you from Nichole's blog, Living My Life On Purpose.

Know I am praying...Lee

The Patterson 5 said...

I came over from Living my life on purpose. I will be praying for you and your girls. May you feel comfort in knowing God is holding you in His powerful right hand. Keep up the fight!

Chatty Kelly said...

Cindy - I just came over from a prayer request about you at "Living my Life On Purpose." I will pray for you and your family. The Lord will be walking along side you, and will carry you if you get too tired to continue.

God's blessings on you at this difficult time in your journey.

Pinkshoelady said...

Hi there!
I just came over from On Purpose. I read through your journey so far and I am on my knees today for you!

I have never had cancer but enough other life threatening health issues so I do understand the fear and how hard it is to let others take care of you, when you are young and should be able to take care of yourself.

I will keep praying...because I believe in the Almighty! He is Jehovah Raffa! He is your Healer!
He will also take care of your family. He is their God also.

God loves you! He made you for His glory!

I will pray and ask my church to pray don't know me but you are not alone.

Anonymous said...

I too came over from a friend's blog.-- isn't it funny how this whole blog surfin' works? :o}

I don't know your whole story but wanted ya to know that I said a quick prayer for ya as I was reading. My mom had breast cancer and ended up having a single mastectomy. She is doing well and living life to its fullest. I am sure you have heard many stories of people, relatives, etc. that had/have cancer. I guess it's our way of trying to relate and how much we would like to SPIT on cancer! lol I hate it!!
I'll look forward to your updates.
Hugs coming your way.

Cindy said...

Just came over from 'living my life on purpose'. I will bookmark you and pray daily for you and your family as you embark on this journey.
God will give you all the strength, grace and love you need. Ask for help from friends and family. Often they don't know what to do but are just waiting for someone to ask.
God's peace to you, Cindy

Kimberly said...

I came over here from On Purpose. I know I do not know you, but as a woman, as a mom, my heart aches for you that you are facing this. But I am so glad that you know that you are not facing it alone...that God will carry you through this every step of the way.

I am praying for you and for your family!
In Him,

Emily Tallman said...

I am praying for you Cindy!

Joyful said...

Just came over here from Nichole's blog. Wanted to let you know that I will be praying for you.

Hugs and prayers,

Truth4thejourney said...

I am coming over from another blog this morning. I am very sorry that you are going to have to go through this. I am praying that you will find your satisfaction and joy in Christ and that He will sustain you and your family as you travel this road. May He grant you victory and healing.


The Ballinger Family said...

Still praying over here in TN.....

Leebird said...

Hi there,

Thanks for visiting my blog today to help me celebrate my dad's 77th b'day.

The Lord is birthing something in my heart to give to you as an encouragement tool during your battle with cancer. If you feel comfortable, please shoot me an email so I can send it to you when the Lord finishes it through me. You can find my email on my profile. Praying hard, Lee